What Am I Doing?

What am I doing?

It's 2:34 in the morning, and I'm waiting for a text. I already know exactly what it's going to say when I... got it!

And I was right. It says he's going to bed.

Anyway, I'm tired, but I don't want to sleep. I never want to sleep anymore. My life is weird right now. It is absolutely nothing that I

Oh my god I hear police outside. I just heard a walkie-talkie thing or whatever. Are they in the yard? I'm too scared to look... :o Uhh, they better not knock on the door because I don't want to have to be the one to answer it... I don't hear them anymore. Maybe they went to the neighbors house where they belong.

I just got up the courage to peek out the window. There's no one out there. Not even a police car in the circle. I did wait a whole minute, so I guess they left. And I know it wasn't the tv in the other room because I just checked, and it's on Futurama.

Ughh, all this is pointless anyway!

...I was saying my life is absolutely nothing how I would have expected it to be at this point. Not that I had high expectations. My life is good right now. It's just... a lot of changing.

I never update this blog much anymore because I really just don't have anything to say. All I ever do is either a)hang out with Nate or b) nothing. I spent the day with Nate yesterday. We went out and had Chinese and we came back to my house and watched Ink and baked cookies and just hung out. He always asks if I want to do something, like go somewhere or just DO something, ya know? I'm perfectly content with what we've been doing, which is nothing. But we're doing nothing together haha. I guess I'm boring. But it is economical! Not spending money on gas or any other things. I really hate people spending money on me, and when he asked if I wanted to hang out, he said he had just got paid and wanted to know if I wanted to do something. With which I replied that I don't know what there is to do around here and you don't have to spend money to have fun. You especially don't have to spend money on me. I guess I get it from my dad. I always want to pay for my own movie ticket or food or whatnot. Eh, but I digress.

We're hanging out again tomorrow. Idk what we'll do, but I know we'll most likely watch some movies. I love watching movies, and I hope he loves watching movies as much as he puts on because we watch a lot of movies, and, again, I am perfectly okay with that.

Tuesday I'm going back up to Davidson country to help clean out my great grandmother's house. Gonna be there for 3 days (which I was not expecting), but I guess that means I'll get to swim in the pool at Nana's some more. I think the plan is that we're going to stay in my great grandmother's house, but I don't like the idea of that. She died in that house. And I don't believe in ghosts, but I just think it'll be uncomfortable, ya know?

So, I won't be back until Thursday. And... ugh, there are a few more things I want to say, but I'm not going to. Nate is going away for two weeks to Pennsylvania and New York, so since I won't have choice A, I'll probably be doing choice B - nothing - for those two weeks. But maybe I'll chat up some friends and hang out with some other people. It won't be long now before my chances of hanging out with people will be very few and very far between.

Oh, and about college. Everyone else at other schools has already registered for classes and been to orientation. I have heard absolutely nothing from my school in awhile. I hope this is normal. I'm not worrying yet, but I hope I hear something from them soon - like roommate information! - because I'm about to be a little concerned.

I've typed way more than I intended. Oh, and there's still no good surveys. I've come to the conclusion that bzoink has turned to shit, and I should find another website for surveys.

Anyway. 3 til 3am. I guess I'll go to bed now.

A little of this

Why I am a bad girlfriend, conversation from yesterday in B Flat Major:

Nate: Heyyy, you know what tomorrow is, right?
Me: Tuesday?
Nate: *shakes head*
Me: The 21st?
Nate: Yeah, but what else?
Me: The first day of summer!
Nate: No... Gosh, I feel like such a girl right now!
Me: Is it something I should know?
Nate: No, I guess not.
Me: Ohh! I know!

Our - what would you call it? - two monthiversary

Lmao. He should know that I don't do anniversaries. I guess he does know that now.

But today we've been together for two months if that says anything. It sounds like such a short amount of time; it feels like it's been longer. I've enjoyed it though.

Something I've been thinking about a lot is that when we start college, I'll be in Memphis and he'll be in Chattanooga. Across the state. 7 hours away from each other. I don't know if I want to do a long distance relationship or not, but I'm pretty sure he's all for it. (We haven't talked about it). Because last night as he was leaving he asked if I wanted this to be long-term, and I instantly thought of college and the situation which I'm positive is what he was referring to. I said yes because I don't have any reason not to, but I've had a bad experience with long distance. And this is a completely and entirely different situation because he is a completely and entirely (and ultimately much better) person. We'll see how it goes, I guess.

Also, when he texts me, I always start singing Justin Bieber in my head... "Baby, baby, baby, ohhh"... Haha, it's because he says "baby" so many times in one text. I'd give an example, but it's pretty self explanatory.

Hmm...I'm sorry for making this all about him. I've spent the last two days with him. Really, I just spend a lot of time with him now, and I don't really have anything else to talk about.

I was gonna do a survey to add a little variety to this here post, but dammit every time I go to Bzoink all the surveys suck. That's right, I said it: SUCK! They suck! One day I went there to take a survey and, I shit you not, EVERY. SINGLE. ONE was a music shuffle survey. What the fuck? One music shuffle survey is MORE than enough! Anyway. I've been wanting to do a survey lately cuz I haven't done one in awhile, but if this shit keeps up, I guess it ain't happening. Yeah, anyway... I might write more tomorrow. I think tomorrow I'll actually be, like, by myself and unsociable.

Oh, and just to throw this out there: I LOVE American Tragedy. I kinda hate to admit it, but I absolutely love Danny's voice. I'm still all for Deuce, but Danny is just so good. Maybe even better. :o Shhh... (The songs have a little more substance, too, instead of all just being about drinking, drugs, bitches, and/or hoes).

Tell me now tell me how I got so lucky, my dear

I'm home now. I actually came home the other night. I very much enjoyed my time at Nana's house. And spending time with Nana, Larry, and Nick. I did not enjoy that Nick still places his dramaqueen girlfriend above everyone else. He talked to her on the phone for 2-3 hours every night after texting her all day long. And the day before we all left, he went to her house for half the day to help her move furniture. The furniture moving could have waited. She could have waited til this weekend to paint her room. -.- Relationships where people's lives revolve around each other sicken me. Grow some independence. I mean, my life doesn't revolve around Nate, and I don't see him every single day. There is nobody in this world who I want to see every. single. day.

Anyway... I don't really know what to talk about now. Nate came over yesterday. We watched SLC Punk! because he's never seen it. We also watch Doomsday, which neither of us have seen in a couple of years, and Logan was over and we all had a gay old time. And milkshakes! Yep.

He told me I mean a lot to him, which, frankly, scares the hell out of me.

I've kinda gotten out of the habit of spending all my time online and I don't know what to do with myself. I've got all kinds of books to read, but for some reason, I feel like I'm being extremely unproductive if I read, although it's probably more productive than just sitting on the computer or watching tv... Damn this new evolving SOCIAL lifestyle! I feel like I should be spending time with people now. Maybe it's subconsciously because I won't be seeing anyone much anymore come August. :/ College is freaking me out more and more each day...

More Donuts

Well, I'm having nothing short of a blast.

I guess I'm going to go in backwards chronological order because that's how my mind works.

Today, we ate at Mikado. Japanese steak house. It was delicious food and wonderfully funny show. Our Japanese chef said his name is Bruce "B-R-U-C-E" and he's from Chicago. Lol. I could say all the funny stuff he said and did, but I kinda don't feel like typing all of it. After that we went to Kroger because we needed Milk, and we dubbed today "Doo Day" and anything Doo said, goes. So anytime Nick or I wanted something, we said, "Doo said he wants___." Then we went to Dunkin' Donuts and got some donuts. I got blueberry! My favorite. :9

Yesterday, Nate drove all the way here to see me. :) He brought his brother (which was my suggestion because I didn't want him driving an hour here and back by himself). They hung out from 1pm to midnight. Haha. We swam for a few hours, had pizza, then came inside and watched movies. We watched Taken and Live Free or Die Hard. Nick had his girlfriend over. Nate said he had fun and that Andrew liked everyone, which makes me glad! :) I, too, had a wonderful time.

Saturday night we went Puckett's and saw my [4th?] cousin's band play. They were great as always! And funny! Near the beginning of the show, one of them dropped the tip jar and it shattered. So later they had a plastic bucket for tips, and they said they had to raise money to pay for the first tip jar. They called it, "Tip Aid" lmao. They were playing for tips though. I hope they got lots and lots. I tried philly cheese steak for the first time while I was there. It may have been made differently than philly cheese steak since it was called "Tennessee Philly," but I wasn't a huge fan of it. I still had a great time though.

We've done other stuff, but I'm kinda too lazy to think hard enough to remember...

I've been keeping up with The Voice. I've fallen in love with it! And Dia is still in the running~! I've also been watching America's Got Talent. So entertaining!

Okay, I guess that's all I've got to say for now.

Berry Hill Bunnies

Johnny is home and as funny as ever! Haha. Nate got to meet him and experience his comedy firsthand. Fonz was with me when we picked him up from the airport (he was decked out in a suit and smoking a pipe - I felt we should have picked him up in a limo), so he got to enjoy it too.

Also, I heard very good news from Fonz today! It's not my place to talk about it, but it made me happy, and I know it made his whole fucking week probably!

I put Asking Alexandria, Pierce the Veil, and Sleeping With Sirens on my computer. I never really wanted to like these bands, but I've heard some songs by them and liked them, so I'm giving them a chance. SWS is my favorite of the three.

I also added Memphis May Fire and Ivory. (Ivory is the black sheep of this group of bands, but I already love Ivory and had to have their music). I already like both of these bands and don't need to "give them a chance."

So, today I woke up early, and now I'm at my grandma's. I'll be here all week! I swam all day in the pool, got a little sunburned, and had a great day. We ate at Panda Express, and it was pretty good. Then we went to Krispy Kreme. Today is National Donut Day. We got free donuts! And they were freshly made. Still warm and absolutely delicious. :9

Since we were in Berry Hill, I said with a name so cute, the town could only be populated by bunnies. Nick busted out laughing cuz he wasn't expecting that. Then somehow we turned them into cannibal bunnies. Silent Hill, Berry Hill - whatever.

Then we went to Kroger to get snacks for the week and it was a nonstop joke fest. Military jokes! Since Caleb is in the Navy and Nick is joining the Marines, it was inevitable.

Now I'm absolutely pooped and this is just day one.