Intermission

I feel like I haven't had the time to write... I'm not home much lately. There are a lot of things to talk about... I'll get around to those things eventually.

I never feel like it's my place to tell anyone what to do; so I don't. I let them do what they want all the time. Why not? People can make their own decisions. People should have the foresight to know consider the consequences of every decision they make. I know this doesn't apply to many people. Hell, I consider everything and still make bad decisions despite the possible consequences. But... that said, when someone's actions get to be more than I can handle, I have to leave. I'm not trying to change anyone; I accept people the way they are. However, sometimes the way someone is just isn't compatible with the way I am.

Usually that's not the case because a little thing called tolerance.

That wasn't necessary a prologue to the rest of this post. Just something that's been on my mind lately...

So, anyway. Jonah is in California this weekend. He's there for church. I now know a lot more about his church, and I am at no liberty to disclose any of the information about it. He has told me a lot about it, but it's not really for anyone else to know. I get it now. I understand the church. I know what draws him to it and why he is dedicated to it. I don't necessarily agree with it because I'm not an advocate for anything even remotely religious... But I'm not against it. I do like that it motivates him to do good, for the most part. As in it keeps him mostly from living a super shady lifestyle.

But he is in California... and California is a candy store of a drugs. I just hope he doesn't get into any trouble out there.

Something about this relationship still doesn't feel real. He'll be sitting right next to me, and I will look right at him and tell myself it doesn't feel real. It hasn't set in. It's just been so long since I've felt some kind of security with another person. Of course, I mean security in the sense of a real, definable relationship with someone I can, so far, trust and rely on and with whom I can return that favor.

I'm not gonna fuck this up.

And I'll quit talking about it so much after I've got it all figured out.